Proud

Proud

feeling pleasure or satisfaction over something regarded as highly honorable or creditable to oneself (often fol. by of, an infinitive, or a clause). Source - dictionary.com

Today was Darcy's first day of school. He was a champion and I am very proud of my big little boy. We have been practicing for school and he has been wearing his uniform for about a week, and we practiced for a couple of days eating from a lunch box so he would know what to expect. And even though he is practiced in the art of being dropped off at childcare there was always going to be a question of whether he would scamper into class happily, or dissolve in a flood of over-excited tears. I am happy to say he scampered with almost no backward glance. He did stop and wave and say "Bye" and then he was off. I needed no further push and turned and headed out the door before he changed his mind. It was a great morning :D

If I can get him to be that happy every morning for the next 12 school years I will be a very happy Mummy indeed LOL.

Ashtanga

Ashtanga Yoga

Ashtanga Vinyasa yoga is a form of Hatha (physical) yoga that, like other physical forms, uses postures and breathing techniques as a starting point for attaining a state of 'yoga' or 'union'. Source - Live Better - Ashtanga Yoga by Anton Simmha

I bought a book today. I had a $15.00 Dymocks voucher that I was determined to use and after spending a blissful hour sitting in Dymocks Broadway reading some great books - all of which I wanted to buy - I chose a book. Not only because it was $14.95 (but that was very helpful) but because it is a compact, very simply written book, with clear pictures and descriptions. This is what I need to begin my yoga journey.

Bikram

Bikram

Bikram Yoga (Bikram Parmar) is a style of yoga developed by Bikram Choudhury. Bikram yoga is done in a room heated to 105°F (40.5°C) and accompanied by specific dialogue. People of all levels, ages and body types usually practice together with a teacher acting as a guide, taking the class through the ninety-minute series. Bikram's Beginning Yoga Class consists of a sequence of 26 yoga postures (or asana) and two breathing exercises. Source - Wikipedea.com

Ever since I took Shiny Ruby's Yoga Workshop last year I have wanted to get more involved in Yoga. But have done nothing. I read Mary's & Philippa's posts when the positive messages of what yoga has done for them jump off the page and think to myself "I need to get into that". And have done nothing. But having done nothing - and not doing anything in the future are two completely different things. Sometimes it takes a different twist to make me propel into action.

It was whilst reading Shiny Ruby's blog the other day I started jumping from link to link and ended up reading all about Bikram Yoga. It sounded fascinating. I even Googled for local classes and ended up reading more and more about Yoga. One of the things I read really resonated with me and I think uncovered a reason why I had held off jumping in again. When I did the workshop I loved it, but I injured myself. My body was obviously not yet ready to do a full class and I did not hear the messages it was giving me during the class so I kept going. I was not in pain during the class but in the days that followed my body certainly told me it wasn't ready. So when I read that a good way to start is to learn a couple of poses at a time, practice them, make sure you can move smoothly from one to the next and then add the next pose in. And so on until you can do a full series for a great workout for an hour or more. Ahhh the old lightbulb moment.

So many times I put off doing things - not just yoga - but debt reduction, savings, cleaning the house, exercise, weight loss, anything - because all I see is the big picture and I get myself so overwhelmed before I even start that I end up not doing anything at all and the problems escalate. I need to slow myself down. I need to take a deep breath and just accept that the smaller steps I take will eventually lead to the big picture. That the snowball effect that I know will help pay off my debt (thanks for that again Stella :D) will also work in other areas.

Friendship

Friendship

...That my life has been richer, because I have found, the meaning of friendship in you.- .Source - excerpt of a poem author unknown

I think I have mentioned in the past that I come from a background of very few true friends. Oh I had people I could talk to at school, and anytime I was sent away on sporting camps I had a great time and would never lack for someone to talk to. Or more accurately who would listen to me talking LOL. But I never had friends that I could say accepted me for who I was right now. Not caring about past or future or making assumptions or pushing agendas on me. But I do now. And even though we meet more on-line than we do physically I am so glad that I have friends that I can surround myself with. Because they make me feel better about myself.

OK some of them make me realise how much older I am as they gallavant off around the country doing everything they possibly can LOL but they accept me for who I am. Right now. Which is a 38 year old (gee that means I am 40 next year!! - better start planning the party now), Mother of two very active young boys, who has some image issues, but also just wants to have a laugh. I am glad that people can see straight into my heart now because it is when the face gets tired, and the words come out wrong, that it is the heart that reflects the real me.


Thanks to Mary for organising and creating a wonderful BBQ, to Dan for being a very 'manly' cook, to Philippa for allowing herself to be swamped by all these Sydney people that see her as a bit of a celebrity (or is that just me LOL) to Cath & Craig, Sarah & Tom, Jodie & Zoe, for being excellent company, and to Craig and Andy for setting me straight on Obelisk Beach. Sounds wonderful but I think you are right in me giving that a miss for now :D

Dreams

Dreams

Even if everyone says you don't stand a chance, don't give up on your dreams.Source - mottos for success

Chemist scales say 84.6kgs. Lost 500gms. The dream ain't over yet baby.

Stats

Stats

The mathematics of the collection, organization, and interpretation of numerical data, especially the analysis of population characteristics by inference from sampling.Source - dictionary.com

Monday Lunch-time Chemist Weigh In

Height	175cms
Start Weight	85.1kgs
Current Weight	84.0kgs
Loss	1.1kgs
% Loss	01.3%
Goal Weight	70kgs

Monday Weighing Date	Current Weight
08 Jan	85.1kgs
15 Jan	84.6kgs
05 Feb	84.0kgs
12 Feb
19 Mar
26 Mar
02 Apr

Refreshed

Refreshed

To give new freshness or brightness to; restore. Source - Dictionary.com

I have had some time out lately. Time to think, reflect, get cranky (which I have been doing a lot!) but generally time away from my feelings and myself. This hasn't been a good thing. This time away has shown me why I wanted a journal in the first place. Why I needed to write and get things out of my head and have a space to write plans, ideas, reflections. Keeping them in my head hasn't done me any favours and it is time I do something for myself again. So here I am.

I did not have a good trip away last year. There were some good days, and a few good events, but overall it was a stifling trip - one filled with family (in-law) manipulations that I did not like and sent me off in a spiral of self-destruction. I think we were only there for an hour before I reached for the bottle. Fortunately it was diet coke and even though it broke my d.coke fast it was that or it was alcohol and I think I chose the lesser of two evils. For now. I shall give up again - just don't know when yet. I am finding I am needing it more than ever and even thinking about giving it up sends me straight to the fridge for more. But I am not worried. I shall get over myself soon and just do it.

Today is the first day back at work for me and even though I know I gained weight whilst I was away I went to the Chemist at lunch and got my starting weight of 85.1kgs. Not a great number but it is a starting point and it means I have some work ahead of me to lose 15.1kgs to get to 70kgs on their scales (their scales are about 3kgs heavier than mine??)

I am so happy my holidays are over and I am back at work. How sad is that. At least there is a positive spin - I can only get happier :)