Knowledge
the fact or state of knowing; the perception of fact or truth; clear and certain
mental apprehension. Source - Dictionary.com
It's a funny thing this blogging caper. The very act of thinking clearly enough to be able to post, or posting clearly enough to be able to think, seems to set things in motion or improves clarity of understanding to a level that still surprises me.
For example. I know that 2005 was a good year for me. I started losing weight, I found out how to be myself a lot more, I met and kept a great bunch of new friends. Then 2006 was not such a great year and my last post last year pretty much put the blame on external circumstances - worry about health, family, finances, etc. But was it really such a different year to the year before?
No.
It only seemed to be because I did not spend the entire year focussing just on me. I did that in 2005 to the extent that I was not able to see anything else. However as I became stronger physically and mentally I allowed myself to open up and see what was around me and face the problems that were already there with a strength to be able to deal with them. Some things did knock me about more than others but for the first time in years I was able to deal with things that I had put in the 'too hard basket'.
Sure I gained a little weight, but I gained a whole lot more perspective.
Weekly wrap up
- Need to maintain focus as it slipped a little in the last 3 days.
- Lost 400gms in first week of BLIII challenge.
- Setting alarm each day to get up earlier, but boys are beating me to it by 'being scared', or wetting the bed, so morning exercise has been difficult. Todays was done but not sure if my eyes were open.
- Hit 10,000+ steps for the first time since last year.
- Water intake needs to be improved (buy new water bottle at lunch time).
- Weekly meal planning needs to be improved (write up weeks plan tonight).
- Feeling positive about direction I am heading in.
- Maintaining excitement about trapeze rather than allowing myself to be scared.
11 comments:
Hi M,
Yes you can call me PG. :) Thanks for the welcoming comment on my blog. I really see a lot of myself in this post.
I don't know about you, but in my own case, I still haven't fully accepted the fact that by caring for yourself with that degree of focus (as you did in 2005), you do give more to others.
Perhaps part of this therapeutic journey is allowing ourselves to have that daily personal sanctuary (for our sleepy-eyed walk, or whatever).
Part of it is also realising that a good life involves loving and caring for others....AND loving and caring for us. Sounds terribly simple, but if you think of how much you love your partner or closest friend and what you would do for them if they needed it -- well, as time goes by we start permitting ourselves to make sacrifices for *self*, like "Even though walking up this hill is annoying me, I love myself too much to let myself sit on the couch idly. So I will carry this poor unmotivated body up this hill, and one day, it will be easy".
Getting onto my inspirational soapbox here :)
Thanks for the post!
and you know, even if you are scared of the trapeze you could just go anyway. Even if you are so scared that you have to be sick or shake with how uncomfortable you feel. Say "self, express these things but know i want to experience this anyway" and you will have fun. It'll be a great time, the last years worries will fall away for a moment :)
ps. 400g is great, continue to feel positive about your direction and anything will be possible.
xox
Your weekly wrap up shows you are heading in the right direction in 2007. Keep those positive thoughts that you are heading in the right direction. 400 gram loss is great.
Blogging certainly does keep you thinking.
You go girl. I am so jealous of you guys going the trapeze.
The mornings are interesting when you have little voices yelling out - 'I'm scared', 'I have a blood nose' etc, etc, etc during the night. It was a battle to get up yesterday, but today I just jumped out of bed before I could start thinking too much (head spin wasn't so great though, LOL).
Have a great day today M. See you again tomorrow.
Jods.
i know what ya mean M, 2005 was good for me 2006 well dont know where time went, and this year. no idea i think it will be over before i get my head into gear.
fiona
excellent work on the pedo. 10,000 is alot and worth the effort.
You have such an awesome attitude and way of looking at life and how you fit into it. You constantly make me think girl and I really appreciate that. I am so damn happy you're back in blog world! You are going to *continue* to shine and grow :-)
I totally understand what you mean about the weight loss journey being about you. We can lose perspective very easily but keep remembering why you need/want to do it too and realise that you have gained so much energy from losing as much as you have already!
Great post M, I hope this renewed focus makes any difficulties faced a little easier to deal with. I think I said it before but am glad to see you back.
i love this post. U working out exactly what was in your head and analysing what u wrote at the end of last year put a lot of perspective on everything for you - and for me. It is so important to combat problems that stop us from putting ourselves first all the time.
Urgh, bloglines didn't tell me you had been busy here!
Sometimes things just are different, even if they don't seem like they are. Either way, it's great that you are back in the game ;o).
Incidently, I remember 'being scared', "D-AAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDD, I'm SC-AAAAAAAAARRRRRED!!!" hehe.
So glad that you are back in blog land. Hope all is well in your world. Sounds like you are getting back on top of stuff! Yay you!
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